Author: listeningtomylife7

I spent much of my career in education, serving in several capacities in the public schools.  I was a teacher, counselor, sex-equity coordinator, introducing and implementing Title IX, and principal. I left a tenured position and started my own business as an educational consultant in organizational change.  At 55 I stopped everything and followed Spirit’s whispers which lead me into a deep spiritual healing. I share my healing journey in my new memoir, "Listening to My Life." It is available on Amazon in both print and e-book format.  I am  a spiritual director living in Tacoma, WA, and continue to enjoy hiking, gardening, traveling , and reading. 

Gifts of the Magi

by listeningtomylife7, posted in spirituality, Uncategorized

cold-colors-forest-688660.jpegWe come to this season from different traditions. All traditions celebrate the miracles of this time of year. I come to this time through the lens of Christianity. Advent is a time of waiting in quiet solitude for the returning light. Winter solstice honors the quiet of the winter months where the ground is cold and dark so the seeds can rest and germinate for the coming spring. It is difficult to follow our bodies yearnings to be still and listen during the busiest time of the year. How do you balance solitude and community? I’d like to reflect on the Christmas story, but with a different look at the gifts of the Magi. I’ve gathered 18 gifts from Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book Simple Abundance. These gifts/qualities for the journey include:

Unconditional love.   Selflessness.   Trust.    Faith.     Forgiveness.

 Wholeness.   Second Chances.    Comfort.     Joy.     Peace.

 Reassurance.    Rejoicing.    Generosity.    Compassion. 

Charity.     Wonder.    Acceptance.    Courage. 

Reflections: 

1. Which ones are challenging for you? Which are fully integrated into your life? 

2. How do they play out in your life? 

3. Which one would you like to carry with you through this season?

4. Are there any that are easier to give than receive?

May you find time in this busy and miraculous season for the silence to be still and listen. A time to go inward and reflect on your life and the meaning of this time of year. Happy Holidays to all. 

Reposted from my Writing Prompts blog available at http://www.listeningtomylife.blog

 

Gifts of the Magi

by listeningtomylife7, posted in writing prompts

We come to this season from different traditions, yet all traditions celebrate the miracles of this time of year. I come to this time through the lens of Christianity.  Advent is a time of quiet solitude.  Winter solstice honors the quiet of the winter months where the ground is cold and dark so the seeds can rest and germinate for the coming spring. It is difficult to follow our bodies yearnings to be still and listen in the busiest time of the year.  How do you balance solitude and community?  I’d like to reflect on the Christmas story, but with a different look at the gifts of the Magi. These are gifts offered for our journey.  I’ve gathered these 18 gifts from Sarah Ban Breathnach’s book Simple Abundance.  They include:

Unconditional love.    Selflessness.    Trust.    Faith.    Forgiveness.

Wholeness.    Second Chances.    Comfort.    Joy.    Peace.

Reassurance.    Rejoicing.    Generosity.   Compassion.   Charity.

Wonder.    Acceptance.    Courage.

Reflections:

  1. Where are you on your journey with each of these gifts/qualities.?
  2. Which ones are challenging for you?  Which are fully integrated into your life?
  3. How do they play out in your life?
  4. Which one would you like to carry with you through this season?
  5. Are there any that are easier to give than receive?

May you find time in this busy and miraculous season for solitude to be still and listen.  A time to go inward and reflect on your life and the meaning of this time of year.

Happy Holidays to all.

Remember to free write with no editing or critiquing.  

Letting Go of Perfectionism

by listeningtomylife7, posted in Uncategorized

Perfectionism is the highest form of self-abuse.  Anne Wilson Schaef

The holidays are filled with unrealistic expectations of perfection.  We want to cook the perfect meal, buy the perfect gift, decorate our homes perfectly.  With all this pressure to have the perfect holiday, the season’s meaning disappears as we frantically try to meet everyones needs.

Below is an excerpt from my memoir Listening to My Life sharing my struggle with perfectionism.

Allowing myself to not be perfect has been a hard lesson for me to learn.  Doing it right the first time was so ingrained in me.  Mistakes are still sometimes abhorrent to me.  My head knows that making mistakes is the way we learn, my heart fears being wrong.  The message of If you can’t do it right the first time, don’t do it, is like a post-it stuck to my soul.

I have two mantras that help me through my mistakes.  I remind myself that I am human and humans are not perfect.  I heard somewhere that when you accept your humanity, you experience your divinity.  This comforts me and allows me to let go of the need to be perfect.  The second mantra that gives me strength in the face of mistakes is “This too shall pass.” All things do pass. My responsibility is to recognize my mistake and take action to rectify it if possible. It is not necessary to hit myself over the head. I have become much more gentle toward my own humanity, giving myself what I’ve given others all these years.

As the holiday season begins please practice extreme self-kindness.  Holidays are about connecting with loved ones and celebrating the joy of each other. It is hard to “let go” and enjoy if everything has to be perfect.

May you have a delightful imperfect holiday with loved ones.

Visit my website at http://www.listeningtomylife.blog

Seeing With Grateful Eyes

by listeningtomylife7, posted in writing prompts

Americans long ago dedicated a day during this month for the sole purpose of inviting and expressing gratitude. Even though Thanksgiving has just passed, I send you wishes for seeing with grateful eyes.  Angeles Arrien, in her book Living in Gratitude offered the following prompts for us to reflect upon.

—What are you thankful for today?

—In what ways do you express your gratitude? How do others know you are grateful?

—What family rituals and expressions of gratitude have been passed on to you? Which ones have you continued? What new ones have you originated?

—As the year begins to wind to a close, reflect every day of the coming month upon the blessings, opportunities, fruits, and harvests that have come into your life this year. 

—To whom or what are you especially grateful for in your life? In what ways are you shifting your perspective from looking at what is not working to developing “grateful seeing”—looking first for what is working and what is good in your life?

—Whom have you helped this year? What circumstances have ignited your generosity and gratitude?

—What positive changes have occurred in your life that you can directly attributed to your gratitude practice this year?

Remember to free write with no editing or critiquing.  

The Power of Deep Listening

by listeningtomylife7, posted in spirituality, Uncategorized

Our listening creates a sanctuary for the homeless parts within the other person.
Rachel Naomi Remen

Think about how you feel when you know you have been heard.  Listening offers a deep sense of being seen.  The healing power of listening is immense.  When I am heard I don’t have to try and prove my point.  Nor do I have to prove the other wrong.  Listening uses many practices: attention, being present, openness. Quaker writer Douglas Steere says, “Holy listening–to ‘listen’ another’s soul into life, may be almost the greatest service that any human being ever performs for another.”

Deep listening is being willing to hear a different point of view and try to understand where that person is coming from. Listening does not mean you agree with what the person says, listening is telling that person you want to hear his/her point of view. It is not about changing their mind, it is about developing understanding. It is probably one of the hardest things to do–to listen without judging or trying to argue.  Listening is a necessary ingredient if we are to begin to find common ground and rebuild our country on its founding principles. People calling on us with louder and louder voices are asking us to listen.  Today there are a lot of loud voices and very little listening.

The Compassionate Listening Project is a  non-profit organization dedicated to empowering individuals and communities to transform conflict and strengthen cultures of peace.  Their sole tool is deep listening to another’s story.  Once a year they take a group of people to the Middle East to be a part of bringing Isralis and Palestinians together to hear each others stories.  As the two groups sit in circle together and listen to each other, a shift takes place.  By the end of the two days there are tears and hugs and a commitment to return to their homes and begin to bring people together. Has this stopped the conflict in this area, no. It has begun to build bridges of understanding, one person at a time, that ripples through each community.

May we all take time to deeply listen to those in our lives, and to those with a different point of view.  As hard as it is sometimes, I believe listening can help build bridges of understanding and not walls.